Not worth reading.

I've been taking a bit of a hiatus lately while I deal with pretty much ALL the stress. My 5-year-old started kindergarten officially today and my 5th baby was due last Saturday. She's still in there. I've been freaking out for a while now I guess. No time to think, unless you count when I really ought to be sleeping. Speaking of sleep, I got woken up by a vomiting kid last night again. Such is life, at least when it's apparently trying to kill you. So now, instead of trying to get things going I'm crossing my legs and hoping for a Friday the 13th baby and a healthy house to bring her home to. Oh, and praying to not puke myself into labor.

I think I've inadvertently pissed off a fair few of the people I was counting on for support through this by leaning too hard. Maybe I'll just find myself a cozy corner, put down some towels, and try to deliver this baby by myself, like a cat. Everybody has their own crap to worry about, or at least thinks they do. Even my midwife, when I had a false alarm the other night due to dehydration, mentioned that she'd been up since 2am and her mother's in the hospital. Sometimes, I wish I could just disappear and stop bothering everyone I love. I'm sorry, this is really just venting and compared to your problems, wherever you are, it probably seems stupid, or I don't know, maybe it's just depressing. Anyway, this is why I haven't updated lately. I have nothing much worth saying to say. Hopefully I'll have something more worth reading to say another day. Nothing makes you wax poetic like the smell of your very own newborn's head right? OK, maybe I'll just be even more sleep deprived and stressed then. I'll try though, I promise.

For now, I'll leave you with one of my favorites from Emily Dickinson:

I'm Nobody! Who are you?

Are you - Nobody - too?

Then there's a pair of us!

Don't tell! they'd advertise - you know!

How dreary - to be - Somebody!

How public - like a Frog -

To tell one's name - the livelong June -

To an admiring Bog!

O, another note, the world lost a great poet recently with the death of Seamus Heaney. I'm sorry for your loss.